Suffering the loss of a partner, family member or close friend can leave a gaping hole in your heart. Connecting with your loved ones through a medium reading not only assures you that they are doing well on the other side. It also reminds you that you haven’t lost them; while they’re no longer in the same physical space as you, they do remain connected.

A medium reading is a time and space you reserve for yourself—and for your loved ones who have messages to send you from the other side. Sadly, many mediums have turned what should be a very sacred experience into hype.

How to Make Your Medium Reading a Sacred Experience

To hold something sacred is to protect and honor it. Imagine the moments you have held most precious. Are you thinking back to your wedding day? Maybe you’re imagining an intimate dinner with a close friend you hadn’t seen in years. Or a spa day you treated yourself to after completing a particularly tough project at work.

Chances are, you did whatever you could to protect these experiences from outside distractions. You made sure you were fully present for them. You savored them.

A medium reading with your loved ones deserves that same level of respect. You’re communicating with someone who has transitioned to the other side. You love them. They love you. And they have something to say to you.

Especially if this is your first medium reading, here are some things you can do to respect the sacred nature of the experience:

1. Listen to the messages

When you’re sitting for a reading, remember that the person who is communicating with you is speaking from their point of view. I recently had a client who originally rebuffed the messages I was relaying from her father, who had passed several years ago.

Given that he was a doctor, he was very analytical about situations. When I asked her to consider the message from his vantage point, she was able to see that he was actually trying to encourage her—in his own way. Once she became open to hearing his message, she said, “I know exactly what he’s talking about.”

2. Shelve your expectations

Allow the experience to unfold as it will. If you enter a medium reading with certain expectations—about who will come forward with messages, or with questions you want answered—you set yourself up for disappointment.

When you remain open to possibility, readings tend to be a much richer experience. You can invite certain loved ones to show up, but you can’t control who actually does. Saying you don’t want to talk to a person on the other side is as rude as it would be to say to someone here.

3. Be present

A medium reading facilitates communication with people—not “energy.” Recognize the sacredness of the experience. Silence your cell phone. (Better yet, leave it in another room!) Don’t try to “cram” in a medium reading in your car on your drive home from work or during your lunch break.

This is an emotional experience that deserves your full, unrushed and undivided attention. It’s not always heavy; we have lots of laughs, too … after all, people are funny—even on the other side.

4. Respect what it is

A medium reading involves three parties: you, your loved ones and the medium. Each of us brings our own unique communication style, and each of us needs to trust in the process. As a medium, my function is to convey messages to someone I have never met—in a way that makes sense to you.

5. Hold off on the partying

If you’re hosting a group reading, save the happy hour for after the session. A medium reading can be a great way to bond for a “girls’ day,” but it’s not meant to be entertainment. Show respect for the loved ones on the other side by bringing your full and unimpaired focus.

6. Bring healthy skepticism

I often joke that I’m a “skeptical medium.” I believe that it’s better to be authentic than wrong. I don’t want my clients to say “yes” to all of the messages I communicate to them, or to blurt out all the stories from their past. Some skepticism is good—so long as it doesn’t block your openness to the experience. Understand that there will be some “no’s” in every session.

No medium is 100 percent accurate! A good connection, facilitated by a developed medium, is usually on point at least 85 percent of the time.

7. Recognize the strength of spirit connection

It feels empty when somebody passes because you don’t feel the denseness of their physical presence. But even when loved ones have transitioned to the other side, they remain energetically connected to you. Readings demonstrate that. When somebody connects from the other side, you feel it, although in a lighter sense. Know that this lightness does not take away from the connection—in any way shape or form.

After her first medium reading, one client came up to me with tears in her eyes. “I’m not sad,” she told me. “I’m touched by the experience. I felt like I just had the most delightful visit with my grandma. I really felt her presence—and her love—in the room in a way I could never have imagined.”

A medium reading is your time. It’s also time you’re devoting to those who have passed. When you view the experience as sacred, you give yourself the freedom to appreciate the beauty your loved ones can offer you from the other side.


  1. I would love to do this . I lost my son May 7th 2017. I miss him so much and to feel his love if only one more time I feel it would help me to heal.

    I believe.
    Cindy Kirkland

Comments are closed.